Taking a good look at myself

This week I climbed Ben More on the island of Mull. A benign weather window for October made it a pleasure. Although misty on the way up, there was a perfect cloud inversion and the summit was bathed in sunshine, as my squinting selfie shows.

Just before I broke through the cloud layer, I saw the best Brocken Spectre I have experienced, seeing myself staring back through a magical portal, waving improbably long arms. My washed-out photo gives you an idea of it but you cannot see the second glory ring.

Climbing a single Munro may not seem post-worthy, even if I was serenaded by red deer rutting as well as witnessing an optical illusion. But this was my 282nd Munro, meaning I have completed a Munro round - all the summits in Scotland over 3000 feet. It has taken me more than six years, when some devotees do them all in a single winter season; nevertheless it is a goal achieved.

Like many challenges, it started out seeming a remote, possibly unlikely goal. As I hit my stride I enjoyed the process and planning, happily ticking off hills across the north of Scotland. But towards the end, it became something else, more an albatross than an uplifting experience, a list to be ticked off, chores to be completed. Somewhere along the way I had lost the joy in simply being in the hills.

But on Ben More, knowing this was the final hill on my checklist, I was once again free to revel in the special environment of an island hill, climbing from sea level to break through the clouds and celebrate how fortunate I am to be able to explore the contours of this beautiful country one step at a time.

So, I have reclaimed my love of the mountains. I look forward to wandering aimlessly without any target or timescale, no longer driven to reach the summit cairn, simply satisfied to revel in wild places. I will also have to confront the absence of my best excuse for abandoning my desk and my writing! I have long had an idea for a fantasy novel featuring a character whose calling requires him to be endlessly walking, often in remote, mountainous country. Perhaps now is the time to return to that idea and see where that leads?